Ten Entities Your Children Can Summon on Boring, Rainy Days

summoningcircle

Dear readers,

I have been approached by some of my colleagues and temple adherents as to ways they can keep their children engaged on rainy days when outdoor activities are limited while also providing an effect introduction to the occult. Well, one of the easiest options is summoning rituals. Most only require things already possessed in most households: salt, candles, dark-magic grimoires and a little dash of blood. Most are also composed of simple chants easily ingrained through rote recitations before the rituals are attempted. The only truly difficult aspect is crafting the elaborate circles for a few of those listed below, but that will take up more time, build a sense of suspense and teach your progeny the importance of patience.

 

10. Ouija Board

This one would have ranked higher on the list, but it takes some forethought to have such a board on hand. However, if you do, it’s simple enough to make use of. Turn out the lights, ignite a candle and be prepared to have your questions answered.

 

9. Bloody Mary

This one truly is a classic of summoning and is one of the easiest to perform. Though some iterations show numerous lit candles, you only need one– or, alternatively, point a flashlight up across your face. From there, the only other components are to turn the lights off, look into a bathroom mirror and chant “Bloody Mary” three times.

 

8. Baphomet

baphomet-colbert

Baphomet has really gained in popularity in recent time, thanks largely to what you will find in the above video. However, he is really easy to summon, surprisingly. All you need is a pentacle and “I ♥ OK” drawn on a piece of paper in blood.

 

7. A Djinn

Summoning this entity isn’t a guarantee, but it will come with an hours-long scavenger hunt through your home for a bottle or oil lamp. And, if you are lucky enough, you’ll get a few wishes. Just make sure to use the last to wish it back into the bottle for the next person.

6. The Spirit of Biggie Smalls

biggie-smalls-south-park

True, this one is a derivation of number 9, but, I have to admit, by all accounts, this one comes with a more modern figure for children to interact with.

 

5. Der Erlkönig

This spirit is a little more challenging because, if not treated right, he’s been known to abscond with children faster than the stereotypical pedophile who owns a windowless van.

 

4. Robin Goodfellow

Also known by the moniker Puck, Robin Goodfellow only requires a child to chant a little iambic pentameter to summon — though it helps if the child does so while another person sleeps in a forest, but a common household plant will work in a pinch. Also, he is quick to apologize if he fails to make people happy they summoned him.

 

3. A Feline Wearing a Strange Piece of Headgear

I have been told this has entry has been mentioned before by another esteemed professor as an option for passing the time on a rainy afternoon. However, I do believe that that this option bears repeating, and you’ll be enjoying it soon.

 

2. Baba Yaga

In the old days, this powerful hag had to be sought out, but, from my own dealings with her, the Information Age has made knowledge much easier to access if a bit harder piece together. As such, she too had co-opted the mirror trick seen in previous entries to make house calls.

 

1. A Dead Loved One

Let’s face it, the séance may be antiquated, but it’s popular for a reason. It doesn’t take much more than candles and hand holding. Alternatively, if you have John Edwards on hand, that’s all you need.

 


thatcher

THOMAS ANTHONY THACHER is a professor of classics and administrative official at Yale and a high priest of Wadjet-Bast. While not deciphering ancient Greek, Latin, Egyptian and Coptic texts, he can be found at home, tending and breeding his Egyptian Mau cats.

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