Kyz Kuu: The Game You’re Not Playing with Your Lover (But Should Be!)

Looking for a way to spice up your love life?  Or maybe you’re just trying to get that first kiss from that special someone?  Forget OkCupid and eHarmony– in Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, and Azerbaijan, horses are where it’s at!

The Rules

Kyz kuu is a game that is easy to learn, but hard to master.  All you need is a pair of horses, a whip, a boy, and a girl!  While the boy waits at the starting line on his horse, the girl comes racing from behind him.  Once she passes, he must catch up with her and steal a kiss before reaching the finish line.  If he fails– that’s where the whip comes in!  She can chase him back to the starting line, flogging him all the way.

 

The Benefits

• Celebration of Central Asian tradition
• Heart-pounding exercise
• Promotes gender equality and mutual respect
• Mild BDSM elements

 

Playing at Home

If you’ve got two horses and a whip, you’re ready to go!  However, many of us who aren’t blessed to live in the endless steppes of areas like Kazakhstan or North Dakota are a little cramped for a sport like this.  Consider replacing the horses with bicycles and using a wiffle bat instead of a whip– problem solved.  Or if you’re stuck indoors, consider racing to the end of the hallway in wheelie chairs with the woman armed with a flyswatter.  The possibilities are endless if you’re creative enough.  And worst comes to worst, if you don’t get a kiss from your sweetie, you’ll at least have a couple of pretty smart welts you can show off!

 

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ADAM WEISHAUPT is a Professor of Law at the University of Ingolstadt.  His hobbies include rationalism, masonry, and opposition to Kantian idealism.