Five Tips for the Lonely Crypto-Anarchist

So you’ve been wanting to date, but you’re also afraid to reveal your name, IP address, and physical location?  Here are our top five tips for meeting and communicating your feels to a person or persons who may be willing to couple with you!

5. Incognito Mode

One of the things we’ve enjoyed about Google’s Chrome browser is the “incognito mode.”  Essentially, incognito mode creates a little “browsing bubble” that isn’t recorded in your search history, cookies, or browser history once you close the window.

Pros:

• Great for chatting people up, especially when at work, at a public library, or from a roommate’s laptop while they’re asleep.
• Little traceable evidence on the computer you’re using, unless you’re downloading images of your prospective hotty for… later… reference purposes.

Cons:

• As Google warns, incognito mode does not protect you from your employer, your internet service provider, or the websites you visit, all of which may be out to get you.  Their warning used to joke about secret agents watching you.  Now they’ve taken that down.
• Odds are you’re still using some online service, whether it be a chatroom, instant messenger, Facebook, OkCupid, eHarmony, or some other site that is collecting all the data you’re sending to your sweetie.  We know you are not using Google+, because no one uses Google+.
• This is a Google product, and their eyes are everywhere.